Log Terminator is on a roof. John Connor is on the ground and shouting up at him. JOHN Jump, Terminator. Your Terminator legs will protect you from damage. TERMINATOR Negative, Terminator is scared. JOHN You don’t any emotions Terminator, how can you be– TERMINATOR TERMINATOR SCARED. JOHN Terminator we have to go stop Skynet right now … Read more
The following is how the Regular Features team caught Wrestlingmania, and how we used it to kill The Rock. As of 2015, this is WWE canon. SCENE ONE – INTERIOR, THE ROYAL RUMBLE WRESTLING CHANGING ROOM LOG Well here we are boys, inside the Royal Rumble Wrestling changing rooms, where all of the world’s best … Read more
Is your business ready to accept the new five pound note? The new five pound note is money, and therefore in your business’ best interests. But you don’t want to throw good money after bad, so it’s important that you’re “on the money” with the new five pound note. After all, you know what they … Read more
Once upon a time, renowned audio tit Cassetteboy chopped up Stephen Fry’s reading of the Harry Potter books and transformed them into something beautiful. His first story was Harry Potter and the Black Leather Cunt, which was to be followed by Harry Potter and the Underage Blow-Job. Several years passed, until Log decided to copy this idea, … Read more
The following is a transcript from the first episode of Regular Features, aired in 1925 ROBOT FROM THE FUTURE Hello, and welcome to Episode 1 of Regular Features, coming live from the 1920s! JOAN CRAWFORD I’m Joan Crawford, and I’ve got something dead between my tits. Can the Regular Features team figure out what animal crawled into … Read more
Good afternoon. I am Margaret Thatcher. I first came to the public attention as a provider of stunt bras to the Carry On movies. You remember when Barbara Windsor’s bra flew off in Carry On Camping? That was one of my bras. Aerodynamic for flight, and padded cups for a soft landing. The right bra … Read more
Yogamon is the branch of Yoga which incorporates the battle ethics and collection quest of Pokémon. This script describes a typical Yogamon story and battle, and can be heard in Episode 193, Wild Yoga Garlic Dogs. It’s worth it, as the exertion noises in Yogamon are always very impressive. Roaring off the back of his … Read more
Lady Diana Spencer was a top dollar princess. Everyone said so! “There she goes,” they’d say. “I’d goose that madam in a flash, having assuring myself that I’d gained her enthusiastic consent.” This is her story, as animated by the frankly alright Simon Chong. [rf episode=”67″]
An Icelandic football chant, throwing a spotlight on the player’s inability to tame a horse. Your horse is a cunt, Your horse is a cunt, He does what he wants, Your horse is a cunt. Over thirteen episodes of Icelandic Maury have starred horses who do what they want, to the despair of their footballing owners. It’s … Read more
Here is the complete list of TV catchphrases from 1979-1998 Show Catchphrase COntext Are You Being Served? My Sodden Vajoo! I must warn you, Captain Peacock, my sodden vajoo is currently stuffed fit to bust with a formidable array of dicks, many of which are on the vinegars. Terry & June By Poseidon’s Briny Ballsac! Terry: That was the boss. … Read more